Pure Madness
by Time Whoadie
Summary: *clears throat* If you remember the Author Dark Sorceress then my fic is just the same only it takes place at a carnival. Mwuahahaha! *holds millenium rod out* read it, READ IT!!
1. Wilderness Madness

Hannah: hiya ppls! Itz my first attempt to write a fanfic! Well I read all of your fanfics and I was inspired *starry eyes*  
  
Malik: *hits Hannah with rod* O stop sucking up!!! U know u can't write for shit so just get on with it, so we can all get back to our *uses quotation fingers* "normal" lives  
  
Hannah: wait. U just did NOT use the quotation fingers, and u did not just say I didn't have a normal life, WHICH I DON'T, but still just hearing it is enough to make any squirrel attack u!!  
  
Malik: *rolls eyes* uhhh yeaaaaaa *thumbs up in sarcastic way*  
  
Yami: ummm, just wondering ARE U EVER GOING TO START THE FIC!!!!  
  
Hannah and Malik at the same time: OH YEAH!!  
  
Hannah: pst! Just a reminder I don't own yugioh stuff.  
  
CHAPTER 1!  
  
Yami and Yugi are at the park walking around on the trails (authoress: you know the ones that are in the woods and run throughout the park, like a dirt path basically).  
  
Yami: *grumbling in Egyptian*  
  
Yugi: Oh stop cursing me in that ancient language, no matter how much you try Ra isn't going to make me burst into flames!  
  
Yami: Well it was worth a shot! Besides, we wouldn't be out here in this..this..WILDERNESS! IF SOMEBODY which I will not say his name *cough* yugi *cough* didn't -  
  
Yugi: A cup of orange happy juice will clear that up! ^_^  
  
Yami: -.-; as I was saying didn't EAT all the cookies and go on a major sugar high and come into the front of the shop wearing nothing but his boxers with war paint all over him! THEN jumped on the back of a customer in the game shop (duh) singing oh what was it? *does a imitation of yugi by prancing around while singing* I'm a little pony, clippity-clop, clippity- clop, Such a pretty pony, clippity-clop clippity-clop, I like to have my coat brushed underneath the old oak tree. So lets jump and run and we'll have some fun can you come and play with me? Oh yeah and jumping off the customer laughing insanely, while running in circles around him??  
  
Yugi: Well I -  
  
Yami: Oh yeah I forgot! Then u kicked him right square in the ass while laughing insanely, and when he fell doubled over you started yelling like a mad Indian. Grandpa and I had to stop u FROM COOKING HIM OUTSIDE IN THE FIRE U MADE!!  
  
Yugi: Funny, I don't really remember it that way.  
  
Yami: *throws hands up into the air while falling on his knees* RA JUST TAKE ME NOW!!! To be continued. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Hannah: I ran out of space one the last chapter, b/c I HAD AN ARGUMENT WITH SOMEODY! *glares at Malik*  
  
Malik: *snaps out of la la land* I'm sorry did u say something?  
  
Hannah: AH! *mutters in Egyptian*  
  
Malik: HOW THE HELL DO U KNOW EGYPTIAN!?!?!!  
  
Hannah: uh *points behind Malik* LOOK A DIVERSION!!  
  
Malik: WHERE?!?!?!  
  
*Hannah sneaks away*  
  
Continuing Chapter 1...  
  
Somewhere in the middle of the woods..  
  
Yugi: hmmm I'm hungry *looks over at Yami, who is trying to commit suicide by eating poisonous berries*  
  
Yami: Damn! The poison berries aren't working for me..  
  
Yugi: What do the taste like?  
  
Yami: They taste like BURNING!!!  
  
Yugi: *in thinking position* hmm never tasted that before, what exactly does burning taste like?  
  
Yami: *Sweatdrop*  
  
While Yami and Yugi are arguing on what burning tastes like, Ryou is coming down the trail whistling to himself with hands in pockets with his Yami not far behind with a HUGE evil grin on his face.  
  
Yugi: Hey Ryou!  
  
Ryou: What are you guys doing outside? I mean, Yami doesn't seem like the nature type *looks over at yami who is swatting at bugs*  
  
Yami: *swatting* GET AWAY FOOLS!! *evil grin* OBLIVIATE!!! *bugs fall down dead* Mwuahahaha!! *victory dance* I WIN! I WIN! I AM THE KING!!!  
  
Ryou and Yugi: *sweat drop*  
  
Ryou: Is everything a game to him?  
  
Yugi: This is nothing you should have seen him when he ran into the wall in the store and found out you couldn't kick the crap out of it, so he challenged it to a staring contest. Guess who won..  
  
Ryou: *shrugs innocently* I don't know, who won? Seriously, who won?  
  
Yugi: *anime fall* Well the WALL GENIUS! Er well I guess you could say Yami won in the end He uh threw a customer through the wall after his Mind crush didn't work.. Well he found out walls don't exactly have minds to crush  
  
Hannah: yayness! Itz done! *twirls in spinny chair* ^_^ 


	2. Rodent Armies

Hannah: Yayness!  
  
Malik: Yayness??? is that even a word? And why r u so happy? How come I'm not happy? *grabs Hannah's shoulders and shakes* I WANNA BE HAPPY!!  
  
Hannah: U ask to many questions -.-;; *pats malik's head* Everything will be alright, don't worry..but itz a real shame becuz u were progressing so well in ur anger management classes! *sighs* o well back to prozac with u! *shoves prozac down Malik's throat*  
  
Malik: *starts choking*  
  
Hannah: hmm *turns to yami* Is turning blue, for malik, normal?  
  
Yami: *evil smirk* why yes it is!  
  
Hannah: Oh ok!! Well we'll start the fic then!  
  
Malik: *twitching on floor*  
  
Yami: *whispers to self* reminds me of a fish.  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Yugi: *looks behind Ryou* 0.0;;;;  
  
Ryou: What?!?! Is there something on back?? *starts screaming and running in circles* GET IT OFF!! GET IT OFF!!  
  
Yami: *grabs Ryou and turns him around to where Yugi was looking at*  
  
Ryou: *shapes mouth into a oh*  
  
Yami and yugi: *taps foot impatiently waiting for reply*  
  
Ryou: -.-;; well u see, what u r looking at right now is one of my Yami's "talents" as he calls it  
  
Yugi: Talking to squirrels isn't a talent, it's a step closer to getting thrown into an asylum..  
  
Yami: Uhh Yugi, what makes u think he's talking to one squirrel?  
  
Yugi: *gets a closer look behind Y/B* what the hell..?  
  
Ryou: *rubs back of head embarrassingly* Well you see when I came out to get fresh air and to clear my mind off the HUGE test on Monday (itz Saturday) My Yami offered to come along, which seemed REALLY weird, but I soon found out that he was making blue prints on taking over the world and in order to do that he needs to make a squirrel army.  
  
Yami and Yugi: *stepping back slowly*  
  
Ryou: HEY!! You can't leave me here with this Hitler Wanna-be!!!  
  
to be continued ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Chapter 2 continuation  
  
Yami: We can..  
  
Yugi: And we shall!!  
  
Yami and Yugi: *starts taking off opposite of Ryou and Y/B but stop dead in their tracks*  
  
Yugi: ok What is up with all the Yami's today!!! *points at Yami* DON'T EVEN THINK OF GETTING ANY IDEAS FROM THESE ANARCHISTS!!!  
  
Yami: -.- don't worry I don't plan on taking over anything Hell I used to Rule Egypt and that's enough for me!  
  
Ryou: *comes up behind Yugi* I told u not to le- ok now that's just weird  
  
Everyone except Y/B (Hannah: who is still talking to a squirrel getting him to join his army): *nods in agreement*  
  
They all look at Malik who is swinging on a branck like a monkey. While Yami Malik is talking to some naked mole rats that happen to be by the tree (surprise, surprise).  
  
Yami Malik: *to the naked mole rat* And that's why u must come and join my army!  
  
Naked mole rat: *shakes head*  
  
Yami Malik: DAMN U!!! U SHALL JOIN!! *controls naked mole rat with rod*  
  
Naked mole rat: *gets in line with all the other naked mole rats*  
  
Yami Malik: MWUAHAHAAHA! HEY!! BAKURA!! U BAKA!!! U STOLE MY IDEA!!! STICK TO TOMBS!!!!  
  
Yami Bakura: HEY! RULING THE WORLD WITH SQUIRRELS WAS MY IDEA FIRST!!  
  
Yami Malik: PSH! I bet my rodents and can beat urs!  
  
Yami Bakura: Bring it on Bitch!  
  
Yami Malik: *does the black girl snapping and the head swerve* ITZ ALREADY BEEN BROUGHTEN ON FAG!  
  
Y/B and Y/M: *glaring at each other*  
  
Everyone else: *trying to walk away quietly*  
  
Y/B and Y/M: *looks to where everyone is going* OH NO U DON'T U HAVE TO STAY AND SEE WHO UR NEW MASTERS SHALL BE!!!  
  
Everyone: -.-; 


	3. Carnival Mysteries

Hannah: Yo was sup my humble reviewers!  
  
Y/H: *looks around frantically* HUMBLE WHERE??? I BET THEIR SLAVES!! ALL SLAVES ARE HUMBLE!!! I WANT A SLAVE!!! *looks over at Hannah and smiles evilly*  
  
Hannah: *nervous laugh* I'm can't be a slave b/c it's in my contract, so there!  
  
Y/H: what contract?  
  
Hannah: *holds up authoress forbidding being her Yami's slave contract* THIS ONE!!  
  
Y/H: u just made that up!  
  
Hannah: ur point?  
  
Y/H: grrrrrrr!  
  
Malik: And here's the fic! *watches the two in a dust cloud fight* I love cat fights!  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Kaiba: All in favor of just leaving, say I  
  
Everyone: I!!!!  
  
Yami: Hey wait a minute, how'd u get here?  
  
Kaiba: uh..well  
  
Mokuba: HEY BIG BROTHER!!! You promised you'd take me on the pony ride at the carnival today!!!!!  
  
Yugi: *gasp* carnies.. *shakes fist* DAMN U CARNIES!!!!!  
  
Ryou: What carnival?  
  
Mokuba: *rolls eyes* duh, the one with all the rides and stuff over there! *points to carnival*  
  
Ryou: I wasn't aware we had a carnival today in the park  
  
Mokuba: well that's b/c u have more hair than brains, and your just full of crap *points to Bakura's BROWN eyes* (sorry to all the Ryou fans)  
  
Y/B: HEY I RESENT THAT!!! I have to take his appearance ya know!  
  
Mokuba: *shrugs* w/e. ur just full of hot air.  
  
Y/B: *clenches fist* Why you little - *hands cover Y/b mouth*  
  
Yugi: *holding y/b mouth closed* I've already heard to much profanity today *covers ears* MY VIRGIN EARS!!!  
  
Yami: *mumbles* that's not the only thing being a virgin.  
  
To be continued ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
CONTINUING!!  
  
Everyone: WHAT?!?!? 0.0;;;;  
  
Yugi: YAMI!!!! YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL!!! Now I have to refigure my raping plan  
  
Kaiba: Mokuba we're leaving right now!! No way I'm gonna get either of us raped by a freaky little elf wanna-be! Hell no!!  
  
Kaiba: runs off towards the carnival dragging Mokuba behind him, barely keeping up.  
  
Yugi: *snaps* damn that's 2 gone now guess I'll have to just go for the rest *looks up to find everyone hiding behind the same tree*  
  
Yami: HEY I GOT HERE FIRST!!! So back off bitch!!  
  
Ryou: AH hell no!! I grabbed the tree first so it's mine!!  
  
Malik: that's not all u grabbed -.-;;;  
  
Ryou: *shudders*  
  
Malik: Your telling me. You didn't get grabbed by a flaming homo.  
  
Ryou: I am not a flaming homo!!!! I don't even COMPARE to Pegasus!  
  
Malik: Point taken  
  
Y/M: *sitting on branch of tree* Will u guys shut up! The midget will hear u!!  
  
Y/B: *sitting on other branch* *evil smirk* *sing song voice* ohhhh Yami Malik!!!!  
  
Y/M: what?  
  
Y/B: *pushes Y/m out of tree right in front of Yugi* HEY YUGI!! LOOK WHO CAME OUT TO PLAY!!!  
  
Yugi: *looks up to see a VERY scared Y/M* YAYNESS!!!  
  
Y/M: uhhhh no! *controls Yugi with millenium rod* *makes him walk towards the others*  
  
Everyone except Y/M: WHAT THE HELL DO U THINK UR DOING????  
  
Yugi: *possessed doll voice* Come and play with me! ^_^  
  
Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *runs to carnival*  
  
Y/M: WAIT FOR ME!!! *runs off towards the others*  
  
Yugi: *shakes head snapping out of the trance* HEY WAT!!! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE ALONE!!!! *looks around* there are things here that can eat me *sees squirrel* Aww a squirrel! *squirrels turns evil and starts hissing with foam coming out of mouth* Hell no!! I'm SOOOO OUTTA HERE!! *runs off towards carnival* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Malik: Why don't u ever write things at th end of the fic like KEWL authoresses?  
  
Hannah: Well one I'm too damn lazy, 2 I don't have room b/c of this stupid word proscessor, 3 I AM A KEWL AUTHORESS, 4 U SHALL PAY FOR SAYING I'M NOT!!!  
  
Malik: Oh I'm so scared. What r u going to do, write horrible things about me?  
  
Hannah: ...  
  
Malik: HA!! I WIN!!  
  
Yami: WHO WINS??? *picks up Malik and starts shaking him by collar* I ALWAYS SHALL WIN!! LETS PLAY NOW!!! The game..it's called risk u game?  
  
Malik: *about to reply but Yami covers his mouth*  
  
Yami: good now lets do this *sets up game*  
  
Hannah: uhhh here's my wonderful KEWL fic! ^_^  
  
Chapter 3  
  
At the carnival  
  
Yami: AHHH this place is crawling with pedestrians!!! *runs in circles screaming*  
  
Ryou to Y/B: Does he even know what a pedestrian is?  
  
Y/B: *not paying attention, but is staring at the ride called "Millenium Force"* wow. that must be the most powerful millenium item of all to urn that name *eyes the ride* ahhh a task in order to get to the end in order to steal from where it lays! MWUAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Everyone: *staring at Y/B*  
  
Y/B: o.o; uhhh *cough* *cough* I just had a hairball  
  
Everyone: 0.0;;;;  
  
Y/B: Never mind.  
  
Yami: *whispers to Ryou* Does he always talk to himself?  
  
Ryou: You should hear him talking about world domination in the shower..  
  
Everyone: *takes a step back from Ryou*  
  
Yami: Now that's just nasty, you see him in the shower? *shudders* wrong so very wrong  
  
Ryou: *blushing madly* I do not!! I just meant u hear things u don't want to through the door!  
  
Malik: suuuuuuuuuuuuuure ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Continuing  
  
Ryou: *stares at ground* *another mental note* must check if I'm a flaming homo WAIT WHY AM I EVEN THINKING THAT I AM!?!?  
  
Y/M: (who has just arrived) is he arguing with himself? *reads mind* oh I so didn't need to know that.  
  
Yugi: (finally caught up with the others) what now?  
  
Y/M: *smirks* well lil yugi, it seems u do have a playmate after all *points to Ryou who is still arguing if he's gay or not*  
  
Yugi: *eyes go big* REALLY!?!? Oh YAY!!! *runs over and glomps poor Ryou*  
  
Ryou: *snaps outta of it* what the AHHH GET HIM OFF ME!!!! *starts prying Yugi off with pry bar*  
  
Y/B: *starts walking towards the ride in a transe* Must get item *starts drooling*  
  
Y/M: now that's just pathetic *reads the ride Y/B is about to go on* *starts drooling too*  
  
Y/B: IT'S MINE!!! *runs to get on ride*  
  
Y/M: NEVER!!!! *tries to catch up*  
  
Ryou: *gets yugi off, who is still hugging the air not noticing he was no longer connected to ryou* *walks over to carnie and gives Yugi over* have fun  
  
Random Carnie: *stares at yugi* I smell money in the air! *starry eyes* I can see it now, the kid with the magical colorful hair! Ahhhh  
  
Yugi: *star eyes with hearts floating around him* Ahh Ryou you finally confess your love to me, now we can b- HEY WHO THE HELL ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE U DONE TO MY LO- I MEAN RYOU!!!  
  
Carnie: *looks around nervously then bends down to Yugi's ear* Do u really wanna know?  
  
Yugi: *nods head vigorously* (ooo big word)  
  
Carnie: *whispers* ok, now I'm gonna give you some directions, don't question them just go there, and you'll find your lil friend! *hands yugi mysterious white paper*  
  
Yugi: *takes paper* hmm very interesting.. *follows the directions and heads towards the exit of the carnival*  
  
Somewhere in the park  
  
Y/M: *pushes Y/B out of the way to get into the last seat of the Millenium force* IT'S MINE!!!  
  
Y/B: *tackles back* I WAS HERE FIRST BITCH!! 


	4. FREE GOODS! MWUAHAHAHAHA!

Yami: *has half of the game covered in his pieces* I shall now take over Russia  
  
Malik: *looks over at the remainder of the risk instructions* Ur not playing right  
  
Yami: DON'T QUESTION THE KING OF GAMES!!! I decided what happens!  
  
Malik: *pokes at the risk ashes* but did u really have to burn it?  
  
Yami: *nods* Well of course, how else do u destroy evidence..-er I mean "false" information?  
  
Malik: It wasn't false, it was copywriter and everything, UR BEING THE FALSE ONE HERE!!  
  
Yami: *stands up* TAKE THAT BACK!!  
  
Malik: *stands up also* NEVER!!!  
  
Sarah: *eating cookie* I dunno where I came from but I have merry greetings from whoadie, she says that she isn't here right now due to difficulties and that I should start the fic! ^_^ well *pushes the button to start fic*  
  
Chapter 4  
  
Y/M: *matrix pose* Lets go, Y/B! RIGHT HERE!! RIGHT NOW!!!  
  
Y/B: *ninja stance* THE DRAGON SHALL BEAT YOU!  
  
Y/M: -.-; you have become lame in sooo many ways over the years you were stuck in that ring.  
  
Y/B: *pokes finger together like in anime* There was nothing on and they had a Jackie Chan marathon! You'd be surprised how many damn movies/shows he's made over the years! ^_^  
  
Y/M: o.o;;; w/e *tackles Y/B making a dust cloud*  
  
The comic store guy from Simpsons with a shirt that says "I love Yugioh" in front of it with duel monster cards scattered all over he shirt, with the word Duel on the back of it comes at sits in the seat the Yami's are fighting over. The guards come in and remove Y/M and Y/B from each other and throws them in the head office for where lost children go and are never picked up and end up growing up to be carnies. (evil)  
  
Y/M: *sucking on a lollipop while kicking his legs in the air on the table* You know if you had only let me get on the ride we wouldn't be in this hell hole no wait I take that back, hell was actually very nice.  
  
Y/B: *eyes the lollipop* But u never actually have died, u were locked in the rod GENIUS!!  
  
Y/M: o yea. Well I HEARD IT WAS NICE!!!  
  
Y/B: *rolls eyes* yea a real tea party  
  
to be continued ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
continuing  
  
Y/M: OH DON'T GET BRITISH WITH ME YOU OVERRATED TOMB ROBBER!!  
  
Y/B: *steals the lollipop* I'm NOT overrated! And I so happened to sorta become accustomed to talking like a British b/c of my aibou thank you very much!  
  
Y/M: *mocks Y/B by crossing legs and holding an imaginary tea cup* My my, my dear Yami Bakura, what a troublesome situation we have here We are stuck in a unusual sort of place which we are probably going to be gang raped very soon might I add, so would u please *acting normal again, uncrossing legs* STOP ACTING LIKE AN ASS!! *takes back lollipop*  
  
Y/B: *bottom lip trembles* YOU R SOOOOOO NOT COMING TO MY 3,001 BIRTHDAY!!! THERE WERE GONNA BE FLAMINGOS!! FLAMINGOS!!! *runs off crying*  
  
Y/M: *shrugs* wonder whats eatin him? *a dark shadow looms over Yami Malik*  
  
Any somewhere in Colombia  
  
Yugi: *looks around* hmmm the mysterious white paper says to stand right here *sniffs the air* hmm what is that delightful odor? *sees green plants and sniffs it* smells like. POT???  
  
Colombian drug lord: HEY U ON MY FIELD OF er CORN!!!!! GET OFF UR DESTROYING MY MERCHANDISE!!!  
  
Yugi: *grabs some marijuana plants and runs* POT!!! YESS FREE GOODS!!! BWUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
Colombian drug lord: -.-;; now that's something u don't see every day a midget with funny colored hair stealing pot plants *shakes head* twisted indeed!  
  
Back at the carnival  
  
Y/M: *gets grabbed from behind by mysterious shadowed person* what the he- ahhhh! *gagged and pulled away into the shadows*  
  
At the pony ride.  
  
Kaiba: For the last time Mokuba I won't ride it!!!!!  
  
Mokuba:*whimpering* BUT U PROMISED!!! PLUS U DIDN'T COMPLAIN LAST TIME!!!!  
  
Kaiba: *mumbles* well Yugi and his friends weren't exactly here last time we were here now was he?  
  
Mokuba: well if u don't go on the ride I'll have to show them this *holds up mysterious envelope* *eerie music plays* DUN dun daaaaaa  
  
Kaiba: *looks around* where did that delightful music come from?  
  
Mokuba: *stares at stalking beady eyed music playing guy with his eerie instrument* hmm maybe it's a good omen for u to ride the pony ride with me!!!  
  
Kaiba: *tries to take the envelope away from Mokuba* Omen my ass 


	5. Bikers and Fairy Dust

Hannah: *eating popcorn while watching Yami and Malik having a staring contest*  
  
Y/H: wow this is like a bad cowboy movie, a stare showdown  
  
Yugi: oh this is nothing, if u read in sarah's fic u would know of his "fish staring contest"  
  
Hannah: *starts choking on a kernal*  
  
Y/H: Too true aibou, couldn't have said it better than myself Pathetic that the King of games can't win with a gold fish  
  
Hannah: *clawing at throat*  
  
Malik: *blinks*  
  
Yami: *points at Malik* U BLINKED!! I AM VICTORIOUS ONCE AGAIN!!!  
  
Malik: *covers eyes with hands* MY EYES THEY BURN!!!  
  
Yami: *jumping around, contacts fall out* uh  
  
Malik: U CHEATED!!  
  
Yami: No I didn't, contacts are merely to help me see into the other ppls hands, I mean far away objects!  
  
Malik: PSH WHATEVER! U SOOOO STOLE THAT IDEA FROM PEGASUS!  
  
Yami: DID NOT!! IT IS HE WHO STOLE IT FROM ME!!  
  
Pegasus: *sipping on wine* pardon? I do not sink to low standers and use contacts, I use ancient magiced millenium items that have been locked away b/c of it's power.  
  
Yami: EXACTLY!! See Malik, I didn't cheat after all *5 minutes later* hey wait. using millenium items is even lower!!!  
  
Pegasus: and this is coming from a baka Yami who "hides" in a ITEM and comes out to win duels by CHEATING with his "magical" ways!!!  
  
Yami: *crosses arms and sticks nose up while closing eyes looking very much like a little child* I do NOT cheat, it's mere luck and skill, plus I have talent! Your just jealous that you don't have a Yami!  
  
Pegasus: too bad. if I had a Yami we could do so much for each other.  
  
Everyone: *severely disturbed*  
  
Y/B: since this has taken even longer than expected I SHALL INTRODUCE THE FIC!! MWUAHAHAHA! THEN THE WORLD!!!  
  
Y/H: like hell you will, I WILL!!  
  
Y/B: no my fellow companion, ME!  
  
Y/H: I work alone, I was never your companion  
  
Yami: scum flock, so u MUST be his companion  
  
Y/H: why you son of a-*Hannah covers mouth*  
  
Y/B: NOOOOOOOOO MY LINE!!!  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Mokuba: *starts to get on the ride waving the envelope around* come on brother dear  
  
Kaiba: *shoves hands in pocket grumbling evil things as he got on the ride* No one better see me like this or you and whoever sees me are going to "disappear"  
  
Mokuba: ^_^ sounds like a Magic Trick! I like magic tricks!  
  
Kaiba: yea magic trick.  
  
Anyway back to when Y/M was grabbed. He is now in a secret "layer"  
  
Y/M: *is no longer gagged but has a blindfold on* omg omg omg I CAN'T SEE!! *starts crying* oh woe is me.  
  
Luminous voice: your not blind u moron  
  
Y/M: *sits up straight* Ra?  
  
Luminous voice: *sweat drop* yes that's it I'm Ra..*sarcasm*  
  
Y/M: *totally buys it* WOW I FINALLY GET TO MEET RA!! I so get Yami's puzzle for this. MWUAHAHA THE KING OF GAMES LOST HIS BET!!!  
  
Ra: um. well anyways. do u know why ur here?  
  
Y/M: b/c I enjoy killing and hearing ppls scream b/c I'm sadistic. That and I'm trying to take over the world, burn things like animals, and be overly cruel!? Oh and if anyone asks, I so did NOT burn down the rainforest well not on purpose. it was an accident, yea that's right accident..  
  
Ra: *getting annoyed*  
  
Y/M: *goes on for hours about how badly the world has treated him and why he's trying to destroy it* all I wanted was glue but they took that away from me too!! *starts crying*  
  
Ra: ok enough with our bonding time.  
  
Y/M: *crosses fingers* but we're like this!!! YOU'RE MY HOME FRY NOW!! WE'RE INSEPERABLE!!!  
  
Ra: *getting scare* ok that was TOO panzy-like  
  
Y/M: *turns head around nervously* Panzy? Where? *sniffs air* I smell Pegasus, I swear if he tries to um "make nice nice" to me again I'll *shakes fist*  
  
Ra: NO MORE! FORGET IT!! JUST LEAVE!! *shoves Y/M back into the light*  
  
Y/M: *hisses* the light! IT BURNS!! *starts twitching on the ground* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Back at the carnival...  
  
Yami: *hugging a lamp post shaking his head* NO NO NO NO!  
  
Ryou: please?  
  
Yami: DUDE JUST GO IN ALONE!!!  
  
Ryou: *looks inside bathroom full of bikers* O.O; meep...  
  
Yami: Don't be a pussy, if u get raped don't worry it isn't rape if u enjoy it and well since ur....um....well have fun with ur new friends! *pushes Ryou into the bathroom blocking the door*  
  
Ryou: *eyes huge looking at bikers* um I don't have to go anymore so I'll take my leave.. *claws door*  
  
Bikers: *gives Ryou a weird look*  
  
Yami: *opens door quickly tossing a jug of beer in* HURRY DISTRACT THEM!!!  
  
Bikers: *pull out cups and start drinking from the jug* You want one?  
  
Ryou: *scared out of his mind* um sure... *takes the cup drinking*  
  
hours later...  
  
Yami: *has made a lego fort from legos he stole from lil kids that passed by and is now wearing a army hat shouting into his imaginary walkie talkie* I've been surrounded! SEND BACK UP!!! NO ONE GETS INTO THIS FICINITY!!!!!! *pretends to shoot the angry ppl with imaginary gun* boom boom!  
  
Angry men: ITS NOT CLOSED!!!!!  
  
Yami: This bathroom is closed!! *makes a sign with his crayons*  
  
Angry men: *reads sign* oot off ordderr?  
  
Yami: CAN'T U MORTALS READ??? OUT OF ORDER!!!  
  
Angry men: *stomp off*  
  
Yami: ^_^ I win *talks into walkie talkie* good job men, Mission complete!  
  
meanwhile in the bathroom...  
  
Ryou: *swaying arm in arm with Bikers* Oh idie diedi diedi doy, Look at me haircut it's like a broom!  
  
Biker #1: *adds into Irish song* I swear if we stay in this bathroom it'll be our doom  
  
Biker #2: Now I wish I could smoke a shroom  
  
Ryou: hey what's that shadow over there that seems to loom  
  
Bikers: huh? *looks behind them*  
  
Yugi: *waves from corner* hi! ^_^  
  
Ryou: *raises eyebrow* oh *hiccup* it's you.......  
  
Yugi: now that's not any way to say hi to ur new special friend!  
  
Ryou: special what?  
  
Yugi: *runs over hugging Ryou* Y/M said ur my new "playmate" *wink wink*  
  
Ryou: *totally grossed out*  
  
Biker #1: *sniffs air* I smell pot  
  
Yugi: *demon eyes* ITS MINE!! I STOLDED IT FAIR AND SQUARE!!!  
  
Ryou: u STOLE it? From whom? And why? And have u been hanging with my Yami?  
  
Yugi: It's so nice of you to worry about me!  
  
Bikers: *jump Yugi taking his pot leaves*  
  
Yugi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I was going to use that...  
  
Bikers: *busy stuffing it in their pockets*  
  
Ryou: I hate u all *pushes on the door*  
  
Yami: *pretends to fire machine gun at pedestrians* I'm shooting you! *laughs insanely* yay! boom boom boom! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Ryou: *falls over Yami knocking over his fort* bloody hell!  
  
Yami: *stands up staring at broken fort* HOW COULD U DO THIS TO ME!?!!? After ALL I've done for u!  
  
Ryou: *gets up* and what would that "ALL" be? SHOVING ME INTO A BATHROOM FULL OF BLOODTHIRSTY BIKERS??? Or was the flaming homo a bonus?  
  
Yami: homo? where? It better not be Pegasus, he tried to do stuff to me in the UNdubbed version of the Yugi vs. Pegasus ep! *bursts into tears*  
  
Ryou: *rolls eyes* and I should care b/c....  
  
Yami: UR ALL SO CRUEL TO ME!!! I win u duels and what happens *is cut off*  
  
Ryou: Now wait, I don't remember u WINNING ANYTHING for me!  
  
Yami: ^_^ maybe it was a dream then  
  
Ryou: *walks off* I hate Yamis...  
  
Yami: *pulls a random kid that passes by* shh now listen up see those guys in there *shows the kid inside the bathroom* their really um fairies, yea that's it fairies  
  
Kid: ^_^ REALLY!?!?!  
  
Yami: *serious face* Indeed, now they have magical fairy dust on these specific leaves *draws it with his crayons on the ground* I want u to bring them to me..  
  
Kid: No I WANT the fairy dust  
  
Yami: *hits the kid with a stick* SHUT THE HELL UP AND GO GET IT!!!  
  
Kid: *cries*  
  
Yami: ok ok ok how about a cookie, would u do it for a cookie?  
  
Kid: OK!  
  
Yami: that's it lad, take the cookie *evil laugh*  
  
Kid: *eats it without chewing*  
  
Yami: freakin human vacuum aren't u, young mortal?  
  
Kid: *nods then eyes go blank*  
  
Yami: *laughs louder* good things I brought these "Mind control" pills with me!  
  
Y/M: *who has wandered to where Yami was while he had a "chat" with his new slave-I mean friend* YOINK! *takes the pills* I'll take that!  
  
Yami: NOOOOO! I spent two whole hay pennies on that, TWO!!!! *cries* my life savings...  
  
Y/M: but ur the PHARAOH, ur supposed to be RICH!  
  
Yami: *draws a circle on the ground* slaves didn't have any money to give me when I raised the taxes...  
  
Y/M: slaves work for free dumbass  
  
Yami: BUT YOU MUST KEEP THEM ALIVE!!! That requires food, shelter, water, etc...  
  
Y/M: but you don't need those things and ur alive  
  
Yami: that's b/c I'm special  
  
Y/M: I'm specialer  
  
Yami: I'm specialerester  
  
Y/M: u made that up!!  
  
Yami: so?  
  
Y/M: I hate you!!!!  
  
Yami: *sniffles* but I thought we were friends!  
  
Y/M: and what gave u that idea?  
  
Yami: *doesn't listen* I'm so taking u off my Christmas card list! *pouts* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Anyways back to Kaiba who has FINALLY gotten off the ride. Mokuba is skipping behind him humming happily to himself.  
  
Kaiba: *hands in pockets grumbling angrily*  
  
Mokuba: U KNOW u liked it  
  
Kaiba: Mokuba do u value ur life?  
  
Mokuba: yes!  
  
Kaiba: and do u wish to remain alive and well?  
  
Mokuba: *thinks about*  
  
Kaiba: the answer is "yes"  
  
Mokuba: *pause* If u say so!  
  
Kaiba: *mutters to self*  
  
Mokuba: *Cups ear* WHAT! SPEAK UP!! I'M SLIGHTLY DEAF IN MY RIGHT EAR!!!  
  
Kaiba: YOU ARE NOT!!!  
  
Mokuba: *crosses arms* and how would YOU know that?  
  
Kaiba: *sarcastic* you caught me, I stalk you...  
  
Mokuba: *gasp* and after all these years...impersonating my brother, maybe I don't have a brother...I'M AN ORPHAN!!! *runs off crying*  
  
Kaiba: *totally caught off guard* I don't know whether to be happy or insulted!  
  
Back to Ryou who is walking aimlessly through the carnival carrying a hand made sign.  
  
Random people: *quirks a brow*  
  
Ryou: *looks at the sign* what did I spell it wrong?  
  
Random people: *walk away shaking heads* 


	6. The Influence of Angel Dust Upon a Young...

Whoadie: I'd like to thank my reviewers!  
  
Hikaru: Thank me! THANK ME!!! *holds knife to whoadie's neck* I don't hear thanking!  
  
Whoadie: um that's b/c I'm not  
  
Hikaru: do it...  
  
Sarah: My fic is better  
  
Whoadie and Hikaru: NO!  
  
Whoadie: actually I like LadyWolf's fic the best! ^_^ *waves* update soon!!!  
  
Yami: *dressed in a gangst outfit* ON WITH THE FIC! ^_^  
  
Everyone: *sweatdrop*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Random people: *walk away shaking heads*  
  
Meanwhile, our favorite tomb robber entered the scene  
  
(Y/H: He is not the favorite!  
  
Yami: She does have a point, they're all scum  
  
Y/H: *tackles Yami*)  
  
Y/B: *looks at sign* "Britain or bust" hmm is this a riddle of some kind?  
  
Ryou: *gulps* um...maybe...  
  
Y/B: *has not realized it's Ryou yet* so... if you rearrange the letters you get..."I am Voldemort!"  
  
Ryou: -_-;;;;;;;; *thinking* You have GOT to be kidding me...  
  
Y/B: *is now dabbing eyes with handkerchief* and then he killed him!!! With just a touch, b/c his mom loved him! It was HORRIBLE!!! *sobs uncontrollably* And my baka aibou was CHEERING at such a terrifying scene!!!! *shakes fist* DAMN YOU!!!!  
  
Ryou: How can you refer my sign to Harry Potter? How the hell do you do it?? The randomness is inane!!! *storms off*  
  
(Malik: MISTAKE!! You spelled insane wrong!!!  
  
Hannah: DID NOT!! There is a word called "Inane" LOOK IT UP!!!)  
  
Y/B: *still doesn't get it* I enjoyed our chat! *blows his nose* He looked strangely familiar, I almost felt a connection...maybe...OMG!!! He might be my FATHER!! The resemblance is stunning! I KNEW I wasn't raised by worms! ^_^  
  
Now while Yami and Y/M were arguing Yugi had long gone left the bathroom. He went out to expand his horizon on the world of selling pot with his new "posse."  
  
Yugi: *in an alley with a rather large trench coat on* and I'm supposed to ask just random kids my age or younger if they want to buy some of this..."Cool" what did you call it...angel dust????  
  
Bikers: *taps foot impatiently*  
  
Yugi: *rolls eyes* with the whole mafia accent and comment afterwards...  
  
Bikers: *claps*  
  
Biker leader: ok young bean *is cut off*  
  
Yugi: BEAN!?!?!? Where the hell did that come from?  
  
Biker leader: well your not a bean stalk yet, so therefore your a bean! ^_^  
  
Yugi: why couldn't you just use "young grasshopper?"  
  
Biker leader: Don't argue with me  
  
Yugi: but-  
  
Biker leader: I SAID DON'T!!!  
  
Yugi: *sobs*  
  
Biker leader: AS I WAS SAYING! Here comes your first customer now! *hides with his gang behind many trash cans*  
  
Yugi: *has collar up with a hat covering his face, Is also wearing dark sunglasses even though it's in a dark alley at night* Hey kid, you wanna buy some...Angel Dust? (Authoress: It's secret code for pot that only other pot smokers could understand, of course it's false information so don't take me seriously) *in his best Godfather voice* It smells mighty fresh, everyone's doing it. Plus it'll make you happy. You wanna be happy, don't you?  
  
Customer who turns out to be someone you know: You mean all this time I just had to take this "Angel Dust" to be happy? That friendship, love, and peace with each other was a load of crap? Wow...I've lived my life so....wrong...what am I taking these for *throws prozac away*  
  
Yugi: *gasps* Yami?  
  
Yami: Mysterious shadowy figure in a trench coat that hides in dark alleys to sell his mysterious merchandise, you KNOW my NAME!!! WOW!! You break the law AND is psychic! YOUR MY HERO!!! *takes a picture of him*  
  
Yugi: NO PICTURES!!! *takes camera, then jumps on it*  
  
Yami: *blinks, watching Yugi jumping on his camera repeatedly. Nothing happens* ^_^ it's heavy duty! Not that cheap Kodak shit, this is my special home made camera!  
  
Yugi: you MADE a camera?  
  
Yami: *nods* The film is toilet paper and other..materials...as for the camera, well..you know those cell phones that come with candy inside them? Yea same thing!  
  
Yugi: but um...shouldn't it be broken?  
  
Yami: *nervous laugh* so it didn't work that well at first, but my teacher told me to be resourceful so I layered this camera with ancient magic!  
  
Yugi: Where would you be without magic....  
  
Yami: What was that, creepy midget?  
  
Yugi: I SAID..you just called me a midget didn't you...DIDN'T YOU!?!? *attacks Yami* Damn you for making fun of my height, EVERYONE makes fun of my height! WHY!!!! They leave the Miens, leprechauns, dwarves, and other short ppl alone, but when it comes to me...I'M THE SHORT FUNNY LOOKING KID WITH THE FREAKY HAIR!!!!  
  
Yami: *blinks while being held up in the air by his collar* well first off the Miens were weird...their games didn't make any sense. You win you die, you lose and you die. What the hell kindof prize is that??  
  
Yugi: AGAIN with your GAMES!!!! Even though the conversation has nothing to do with games, you somehow work it in there!!! *shakes Yami*  
  
Biker #1: *whispers to leader* um...is he supposed to abuse the customer?  
  
Biker leader: of course! I told him NEVER to take no for an answer! ^_^  
  
Yami: wow for a shadowy figure, you sure know alot about me...do you stalk me? *gasps* Do you watch me at night???? I swear it was only a one night thing!!!  
  
Yugi: *blinks* I'm not even going to ask  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Whoadie:AHAHAHAHA CLIFF HANGER!!!  
  
Y/H: not really...  
  
WHoadie: *sniffles* I can dream, can't I?  
  
Y/H: nope, your not allowed to have an opinion, dream, or any sort of happiness.  
  
Whoadie: why?  
  
Y/H: well duh, your a mortal  
  
so are you  
  
Y/H: -_-;;; not the point!  
  
Malik: *playing cards* and I lay this dealie down...  
  
Yami: *puts a Queen on it* I attack with Cow!  
  
Malik: that's not a cow dumbass  
  
Yami: *crosses arms* and what makes you think it isn't? *crosses out picture of Queen, drawing a cow* HA I WIN!  
  
Malik: Why do I even bother? 


	7. here ya go, u ungrateful piece of is edi...

Whoadie: Will you ever forgive me??? I just left it like that! I shame myself...  
  
Yami: *trying to put toilet paper on the toilet paper roll* (the spring contraption) dammit! This technological object is too advanced for me *throws it away*  
  
Y/H: HEY!!! SOME OF US NEED THAT AND AREN'T AS MORONIC!!  
  
Yami: and who is this..."some"  
  
Malik: *storms out of room*  
  
Y/B: *laughing on the ground*  
  
Whoadie: *also laughing*  
  
Yami: I don't get it!!!  
  
Whoadie: well you'll find out later, I have to start my fic! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 7  
  
Yami: *keeps going* I swore she came onto me first! How was I supposed to know she was a manikin.  
  
*Awkward silence*  
  
Yugi: X.X *scarred*  
  
Yami: *scratching the back of his head* so um...I'll just go and never speak about you trying to sell me illegal products if YOU forget what I told you.  
  
Yugi: X.X *still scarred*  
  
Yami: ^_^ Great we could work this out! *walks out of alley*  
  
Biker Leader: *Comes out* So how'd it go?  
  
Yugi: *standing there* X.X  
  
Biker #1: When his highness asks you a question, you better answer it!! *holds knife to Yugi's neck* Yugi: X.X  
  
Biker Leader: *sighs* you shame me little bean, take him away. he's failed the test  
  
(Everyone: O.o Y/H: how the hell do you fail being a drug seller? Yugi: IT WAS HARD!!! Y/B: Well he DID have Yami as a customer Yami: What's THAT supposed to mean? Y/B: I remember a certain K-mart incident with a manikin... Yami: Why does everybody keep bringing it up!! I TOLD you, it was a one night thing!!!! Everyone: *shudders* )  
  
Yugi: *is dragged away*  
  
Bikers: O.o  
  
Yugi: oh yea *starts kicking and screaming* I'LL BE BACK!! NOBODY FIRES YUGI MOTOU!!! NOBODY!!!  
  
Biker Leader: Now he speaks...such strange midgets these days.  
  
Well after Yami left the bathroom scene, Y/M decided to gather more naked mole rats for his army.  
  
Y/M: STOP FOLLOWING ME!!!  
  
The lil kid Yami fed a cookie too: @.@  
  
Y/M: I don't appreciate stalking!!!  
  
Lil kid: @.@ master...  
  
Y/M: AND ANOTHER THING STOP WITH THE EYES ITS- wait...master? *rubs hands together menacingly* Slave!! I have a SLAVE!!!  
  
Malik: *comes up behind him* well duh, you do have the millenium rod  
  
(Everyone: *Snickers* Yami: that sounds soooo wrong... Hannah: *laughing* Malik: Jealous...)  
  
Y/M: He came of his own free will! I have a slave!  
  
Malik: more like volunteer  
  
Y/M: Shut up mortal! I have a slave, HUZZAH!! I shall name you...Faloop!  
  
(Y/H: FALOOP??? Hannah: In honor of my dead fish Y/H: You had a fish? Hannah: believe it or not, damn goldfish died the next day after I bought it. Y/H: *falls down laughing* Hannah: HEY! I WASN'T A CRUEL OWNER!! *flashback* Faloop, let's paint your scales! Your scales need to be pretty *paints the fish then leaves it out to dry* Hmmm is he supposed to look like that? Oh well *dumps the dead fish in the tank* *End of flashback* Y/H: you painted his scales...*laughs harder* Hannah: and it washed off!!!! Y/H: o.O Hannah: well after hours of poking the fish I had concluded it was dead Y/H: nothing gets past you)  
  
Malik: Faloop? FALOOP??? what the hell is wrong with you?  
  
Y/M: I thought it was a manly name, you of all ppl should know how manly I am  
  
Malik: O_O;; forget I asked  
  
Faloop: @.@  
  
Y/M: come Faloop, we must test your worthiness  
  
Malik: well that's stupid, he's already your mind slave. He already proved his worthiness  
  
Y/M: How about no, aibou  
  
Malik: but-  
  
Y/M: no  
  
Malik: but-  
  
Y/M: WORTHINESS!!  
  
Malik: -_- FINE! *walks off* geez...  
  
Y/M: now then...  
  
Meanwhile, Mokuba had been wandering aimlessly through the park.  
  
Mokuba: I'm wandering aimlessly through the park!!!! *while sipping apple juice*  
  
Sheep: baa?  
  
(Everyone: O.O;;; what's with the sheep? Whoadie: do you have a problem with sheep? Are you some sheep hater? Are you apart of a sheep hating society? You are, aren't you? AREN'T YOU!! You sicken me, you sheep hating freak-in-a-half! Y/H: -_-;; freak-in-a-half?? Whoadie: your not even worthy of being a full freak.... Y/H: but that was random! Whoadie: well so is this fic!!! Y/H: ah point taken)  
  
Mokuba: awww it's a cute lil....*ponders over what it is* hmmm I'm going to have to go with cat.  
  
Sheep: ba ba?  
  
Mokuba: what'd you call me?  
  
Sheep: *blinks*  
  
Mokuba: so your going to play it that way, huh. *sets apple juice down*  
  
Sheep: *starts drinking apple juice*  
  
Mokuba: *gasps, quickly picking up apple juice* I KNOW you just didn't touch my apple juice. You just don't do that to a guy! *acts all ghetto* This is MY apple juice, and I don't want NOBODY touchin it understand son?  
  
Sheep: ba! ba! ba! ba!!!! *attacks Mokuba for the apple juice*  
  
Mokuba: O_O;;;; *while falling, screams* IT'S FINALLY HAPPENED!! THE SHEEP HAVE TURNED AGAINST US!!! SOON THEY'LL TRY TO CONTROL THE COCA COLA COMPANY!!  
  
crowd: *silence*  
  
Mokuba: oh yea...AND THE WORLD!!!  
  
crowd: *runs around crazily* NO NOT THAT!!!  
  
Sheep: *drinks the apple juice then walks away*  
  
Mokuba: it walks....THE HORROR!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Whoadie: *STILL laughing*  
  
Everyone: well what already!!!  
  
Whoadie: The ppl on the commercial are driving boxes, and one guy is washing his box! *laughs harder*  
  
Yami: what does that have to do with Malik?  
  
Whoadie: absolutely nothing!  
  
Y/H: *sings WAR* SING IT AGAIN! WAR! HUH! WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR?  
  
Yami: *starts shaking Whoadie* TELL ME!!!  
  
Y/H: *thinks he's talking to her* well um...weapons? blood?  
  
Y/B: blood? where?  
  
Y/H: *pats his back* there there  
  
Malik: *has no hair*  
  
Yami: *falls down laughing* so that's what so funny  
  
Whoadie: Yea I know, isn't it the greatest? did he tell you already?  
  
Yami: doesn't need to  
  
Whoadie: and your HAPPY about it?  
  
Yami: well of course, I don't care what he does  
  
Whoadie: *thinking about something totally different* O_O I thought you loved your leather!! WHY HAVE YOU ABANDONED THEM!!  
  
Yami: his hair-...WHAT!?!???!  
  
to be continued.... 


End file.
